Saturday, May 7, 2011

Books, Books and Books..

I've been reading as if this my last chance to read. In last 15 days or so, I've been through at least a dozen books. Not much work, insomnia, lackluster IPL, no movies, zero-shopping, anti-social mood have all contributed to the reading spree in their own way. I wonder, what would I be without books.  As I write that, the paranoid in me kicks in to remind me my to-do list: write on "why not to read books" as one of pustakam.net's upcoming articles. 

Though, it has been much fun writing for pustakam, looks like I'm getting too conscious there. And I'm my worst, when I get conscious. What I write about books is miles away from what you call, literary criticism. Nor do I enjoy, *studying* literature. I'm not the kind to break sentences, peep through them and find something. I'm happy burrowing through the work. Fiction or not, I'm fine as long as I can stand (better, understand) what's the author is trying to convey. May be, I'm a butterfly reader. It's high time, I accept that. 

Well, getting on track.. the books I read / reading. 

Who the hell is Julian Barnes? I was introduced to Flaubert's Parrot a while ago, and I did read few pages of it, not noticing who wrote it. Yesterday, when I came across "Nothing to be frightened of", I took him as stranger. Only after reading his profile, did I realize, he isn't that stranger to me. This book (Nothing to be..) is a collection of essays on death. Death being one of my pet topics, I couldn't resist, starting with it. The bonuses, however, were another favourite topic, God and introduction to Jules Renard's Journals. 

I'm too lazy to categorize myself into atheist or antagonist or whatever. I, with all sincerity, don't care if God exists or not. If he does, it would be nice catching up with him for a chat. If not, oh, the world remains petty much the same to me. So, if any of these anti-God statements sound to me as the sound of timber, when the opposition batsman is bowled out, I guess, it's only because, I love people venting out frustration.

God + Death should make for one of those irresistible exy (existentialism) combination. I enjoyed the book, despite enough complaints. 

It was momentary decision to read "Portraits of a Marriage" by Sandor Maria, as soon as I read the first line in Middlestage. Half way through it, I forced myself to take a break from it. What an emotional roller coaster ride?! Taxing. Nevertheless, worth the time and effort. One of those books, which read like research material on human relations.

India Vs Australia, Adelaide Test 2003 (from The Hindu Group) was a surprise addition to my list. Hardly 40 pages, it doesn't take more than hour to complete it, accommodating nostalgic trips to and fro. Deeply disappointed with the book. Having read Cardus, everyone look like amateurs to me. It would take at least few pages to try and explain what this particular victory means to me!  Planning to write about it soon. 


Ramanujan's life in Kanigel's words was an enriching experience. To the psycho-analyst in me, the 360 degree view of Ramanujan, was rewarding. The Hardy-Ramanujan relation was a wonder in itself. Now that I've an idea of Hardy's world, revisiting "The Mathematician's Apology" wouldn't be such a bad idea. 

Julian and Hardy, both, are cricket buffs. Both from UK. Just for the record. 

Asleep by Banana Yoshimoto was the first book I read after, in fact soon after, Mullapudi gaari demise. Unable to cope up with the uninvited tears in a public place, I was forced to take refuge in a book, any book. Luckily, Asleep was what came to hand. Banana's prose took me completely into it, and almost did the trick of blow-drying my tears. The bottom line of each story in it was that: blow-dried eyes acting up! 

Asleep reminds me of my victory over insomnia. (Ok. Pseudo-victory) Given the egoist I'm,  when sleep ignores me, I ignore her. Things have gone so worse between us, that we no longer pretend. Or don't even pretend pretending. I found (or at least thought I've found) a way around her. I took my kindle with a torch beneath the blanket. When that proved painful, I chose text-to-speech on kindle to keep her at bay. By the way, reading on kindle is such a joy. I read double fast on it! I'm increasingly getting comfortable using it, while continuing to crib about the ancient navigation buttons.

Thus I read (aka listen) Saramago's Seeing! He demystifies writing as simply as, "sit-and-write, nothing-else". But I wonder how can his imagination can go to that level of detail. He blew me away. What an imagination! Take a bow, Sir! I've started with "Baltasar and Blimunda", but somehow couldn't give the undivided attention Saramago demands. Have to get back to it. 

Although, Saramago insisted on reading out loud his novels, since he writes in the talking style, I missed his peculiar punctuation, so much so that I forced to re-read those marathon paragraphs.  

Read Knut Hamsun's Hunger. Made a very interesting read. A month ago, I left this book, mid-way through, but after having heard Steve Toltz speak so high of him. His other book "Mysteries" which Madhuri introduced here is still out of my reach. Proj. Gutenberg gave me a chance to get hands on "Looking back at Happiness." 

The most human human was one pain in the ....... No. I don't intend to abuse. Just looking for the right word. May be, pain in the soul? Sounds too melodramatic. No?


Revisiting Bapu Bommala kathalu. It's joy indescribable. Surprising myself, started with Calvin and Hobbes and Peanuts for the first time ever. Winnie, the pooh is also around! 

Adam Gilchrist is my most favourite Australian. But Steve Toltz is coming threateningly close to that spot. His first book was such a treat, that I can't wait for the second. Are you listening, Mr. Toltz? 
    

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Bro..

People who are sick of me, complain that I think too much. People who aren't.. well, they too complain the same. And to prove that I've a hint of sanity going into my thinking, I need strong backups. Like the case I'm trying to present here.

Harsha Bhogle's candid talk with Ayaz Memon is here and here. If you enjoy sensible talking, don't miss them. If you wanna still come back here, petty welcome. There are many topics which that interview touched upon, but here I've decided to talk about elder brothers.

Lets say there's a kid. He has got his eye on a toy, which isn't easily available to him. So, he first tries to get with his own efforts. When that doesn't work, he attracts / detracts the elders to get it for him. If they don't readily agree, he'll start playing his tricks. Finally, he gets what he wants. That's an happy ending? Not really.

After he played with it to heart's content, he may start fiddling it. Or throw it away. Or while still having fun with this toy, something much more fanciful may catch his attention. Now what? Repeat of the above para?

No matter what our age accounts to, I believe, we've this kiddish tendency to be back of something fanciful. Sometimes money. Sometimes security. Yet another time, family. We keep hopping from one thing to another. Without even realizing, we tend to be the same with what / whom we love too.

Here is the need of someone to try and keep us from distractions and help us focus on the toy in hand. The best possible choice, according to me, is an elder brother.

Why not a mom? A dad? Or a sis?

May be, it's just about any body who can see you through with your life. May be, it's just that I'm over-romanticizing the role of an elder bro. May be, I'm biased. Ok.. I'm biased!

There are moments in life, when you're in self-doubt. You can deal with the world, but not with yourself. Those are the moments when you need somebody to stand by you, stand for you.

You've your exams next week and you break your hand today. How nice it is to have a bro to tell you, "Chill! This is nothing! This can utmost hurt you for 3 days. Not more."

How *fantastic* (yes, that's the word!) would it be to lean on the shoulder of an elder bro and cry to your heart's content, for having lost your love, for having lost a beloved, for messing up life, or for getting messed up by life?

A person, who shared the same womb as you did. A person, who was sent few years ahead of you, as if  to set the world right for you. Who, while still a kid to his parents, starts parenting you. Who, while still toying with life, makes sure you've the right toys. Who, while still finding his path, guides you. Who, without being a lover to somebody, is already showering love upon you. He's a mom, dad and a friend all-in-one package.

Not that, everyone with an elder bro can get that lucky. Most of the times, the beauty of a relationship boils down to the two individuals in it, rather than the relation itself. But whoever has got it, I call them the luckiest souls. Where you end up with such wonderful support system for your life, is again a million dollar question.

Harsha opines that we need an elder-brother-culture and see if that helps our budding talent handle life well. Not too sure, if that works. Forced upon relations could be taxing.

I don't dream of meeting a Sachin Tendulkar. But yes, would hate myself, if I lose an opportunity to meet Ajit.

After all, a Sachin Tendulkar ain't a Sachin Tendulkar, without an Ajit Tendulkar! 

God bless the elder bros!