To anybody who has a fair bit of idea of my likes and dislikes, my moods and sensibilities, my way of thinking and interpretation, my interests in reading and writing, this declaration might come as a thorough surprise, if not a rude shock.
Twilight is supposedly an exaggerated love story between a human and a human-eating monster. On the face of it, it is a fairy tale for naive readers, who goad themselves with the idea that LOVE makes everything and anything possible and it’s an abomination for the other lot, who question the practicalities and possibilities. For me, it stands somewhere between. Where and how, is what I intend to tell.
Before even getting into why I like a book in general and why this one, in particular, let’s talk about writer-reader relationship. A writer writes what he needs to write, badly and a reader reads what he wants to read, badly. Yes, the key word is “badly”. To tell the same, in my own way - the freaking way - what I mean is: I care a damn for who has written it. I care a damn on his / her need or urge to write it. I care a damn for the characters created - their moods, their sensibilities, their characteristics. I care a damn if the book is a success or not. I care a damn on how this book is perceived by the world and you, in particular. I care a damn if I've lost your respect as soon as you've read the first line of this post. What I care for, only and only, is how much of the book I could own, how much I could call it, mine.
Twilight’s summary in my own words will NOT be: An impossible and implausible love story! To look at it that way, a vampire and human falling for each other, the human not stepping back even after knowing the truth about her love, the vampire under control when his prey is around, the love, the trust, the pain portrayed are too ridiculous to accept, forget about admiring.
I see it in a different way. For me, Edward Cullen isn’t a vampire. He is as human as anyone of us, but with a trait injurious to his gal. Bella isn’t a stupid gal who’s loving her man blindly, despite knowing he's inhuman, he's a vampire! She’s the one with complete understanding of her man, that she trusts him despite his trait, which is potentially lethal, only potentially! So, it’s not a vampire-human love story, for me. It is a potentially-harmful-guy and completely-trusting-gal deeply in love with each other. As human beings, we’re part angels and part demons. A twilight happens, when the demon in one is taken care by the angel in the other. A twilight is beautiful, not because demon-angel combination is intriguing. It is beautiful because, the angel doesn’t hesitate trusting the human being, despite the demon. In reciprocation, the demon is never let out of control within the human being.
I don’t belong to the rest of the herd, I’m supposed to, who expect their guys to be Edward Cullens. I belong to a special club (which has only me), because I see an Edward Cullen in each human being. Most of the times, we hid him from the world and unleash him only in solitude. Some times, we fall for those, who get scared by him and run away from us. Once in a life time - for only the lucky souls, of course - a Bella enters our life, befriends the demon in us and turns our life into seeming fairy tale.
( Ah! How dearly do I wish a Milan Kundera or Italo Calvino or Marquez, turning my interpretation into full fledged novel. Sigh!)
By the way, I was told, love is blind. I was further told, love is blind because the trust you end up putting in the person is blind. So, I took doubting one’s love to sin. No! The way it works is - at least for the single member club I’m in - the more you doubt a person, the more you understand the person and the more you put your trust in. Doubting is not sin. Letting the doubt win over you, without proper understanding IS. Deathly sin.
In case, the person whom you love the most, can’t even trust you as a human being and treats you as the demon... congratulations! You’re through with what human race dreads the most. Your last breath is a formality now. Of course, life until then, too.
Legal advice sought on the following:
- Can Stephenie Mayer be sued, because I strongly feel, she trespassed my territory, understood my inner world and violated all copyright acts, to come up with following lines:
Sometimes I have a problem with my temper....
I was aware of the time slipping away so quickly, like the black road beneath us, and I was hideously afraid that I would never have another chance to be with him like this again — openly, the walls between us gone for once. His words hinted at an end, and I recoiled from the idea. I couldn’t waste one minute I had with him.
I don’t want to be a monster.
I didn’t want to leave, but it was necessary. It’s a bit easier to be around you when I’m not thirsty.
Don’t you see, Bella? It’s one thing for me to make myself miserable, but a wholly other thing for you to be so involved.
You were right — I’m definitely fighting fate trying to keep you alive.
Yes, you are exactly my brand of heroin.
I’m stronger than I thought. It’s nice to know.
Mind over matter.
You don’t realize how incredibly breakable you are. I can never, never afford to lose any kind of control when I’m with you.
I infuriate myself. The way I can’t seem to keep from putting you in danger. My very existence puts you at risk. Sometimes I truly hate myself.
I love you. It’s a poor excuse for what I’m doing, but it’s still true.
- Better, if I could sue God for his ineffectual scripts..Possible?
